Isn't Science Fun?
Sean Crespo offers a satirical look at some ill-considered remarks by Condaleeza Rice:
"The Security Council is the primary and most important institution for the maintenance of peace and stability and security and it cannot have its word and its will simply ignored by a member state," Rice said...
...In honor of her passing, the scientific community has awarded Condaleeza her own posthumous element on the Periodic Table. The new element, Bullshit or Bs, has long been suspected but never confirmed until today and is now being studied for its potential military uses.
Amusing, but I have to disagree with his last point:
Experts agree that with the potential use of Bullshit as a weapon, world power will most likely shift from being in the hands of the U.S. and China directly to Fox News' Sean Hannity, currently the world's foremost stockpiler of Bullshit.
Mr. Hannity has never kept any Bullshit to himself in his life.
"The Security Council is the primary and most important institution for the maintenance of peace and stability and security and it cannot have its word and its will simply ignored by a member state," Rice said...
...In honor of her passing, the scientific community has awarded Condaleeza her own posthumous element on the Periodic Table. The new element, Bullshit or Bs, has long been suspected but never confirmed until today and is now being studied for its potential military uses.
Amusing, but I have to disagree with his last point:
Experts agree that with the potential use of Bullshit as a weapon, world power will most likely shift from being in the hands of the U.S. and China directly to Fox News' Sean Hannity, currently the world's foremost stockpiler of Bullshit.
Mr. Hannity has never kept any Bullshit to himself in his life.
posted by Management at 9:06 PM
1 Comments:
HOW CRAP WORKS:
REGARDING IRAN'S REFUSAL TO CEASE ITS NUCLEAR ENERGY PROGRAM
WHAT HAPPENED:
Condaleeza Rice said it was time for the Security Council to act if the world body wished to remain credible.
"The Security Council is the primary and most important institution for the maintenance of peace and stability and security and it cannot have its word and its will simply ignored by a member state," Rice said.
Moments later she imploded from the shear weight of her own hypocrisy, setting off a fusion chain reaction which then led, ironically, sadly, to a nuclear explosion. Scientists are now convinced most politician's inner cores are composed of fusionable materials.
In honor of her passing, the scientific community has awarded Condaleeza her own posthumous element on the Periodic Table. The new element, Bullshit or Bs, has long been suspected but never confirmed until today and is now being studied for its potential military uses.
condoleeza explosion small.jpg
ABOVE: Condaleeza Rice's inner core is induced into fusion from her own weighty hypocrisy.
HOW IT HAPPENED:
Stage 1
Condaleeza told the U.N. Security Council, the same one that was disabused of its legitimacy and power to rule by the Bush administration, which she loyally serves, when the U.S. went to war with Iraq against the UNSC's wishes, that they couldn't let a member nation act against its wishes without punishment.
Stage 2
The weight of the years of hypocrisy generated by the myriad half-truths and outright lies she's told which later bely her actions and the actions of the administration which she serves reaches what is called the HYPOCRITICAL MASS, the point at which her existence can no longer support itself against the crushing pressure imposed by her lies.
Stage 3
Condoleeza Rice begins to collapse in on itself, much like a supernova but not majestic or at all useful to the universe, the force of which causes the atoms of her inner core, which is composed of the newly discovered element Bullshit (Bs), to be squeezed together so tightly they begin to fuse together and in the process to release bullshit electrons (-be). This translates her raw hypocrisy through the equation e=hb(2) into direct, immediate physical damage on the world around us as opposed to the usual long-term, indirect damage normally caused by her lies and those of other self-avowed neo-cons.
Stage 4
Never forget.
ATOM MODEL1.gif
ABOVE: The once theoretical but now confirmed existence of the Bullshit atom is about to revolutionize the arms race. Experts agree that with the potential use of Bullshit as a weapon, world power will most likely shift from being in the hands of the U.S. and China directly to Fox News' Sean Hannity, currently the world's foremost stockpiler of Bullshit.
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